EYEHEARTZOMBIES

I suppose I shouldn’t be writing about Joey. Just brings back bad memories. That was the first time I really had to face death head-on. It wouldn’t be the last, but that’s not important at the time that it happens. The next day was worse.

The car that Ray sent took me back to his place. He had a nice joint on the west side of Manhattan, looking over the water. It was in a high rise and he seemed to have the whole floor to himself. I told myself then and there that I was gonna own something like that myself someday. I was gonna make it big and get out of this racket as soon as I could, buy me a house and car, find a beautiful dame to settle down with and make some babies. Sometimes I still think about that dream.

Ray was waiting for me in his living room — parlor — whatever you call those rooms — and he offered me some cognac. I hadn’t ever drank out of a crystal glass before, and I can count the number of times since on one hand. I sipped it and felt it burn its way down my throat.

�So, tell me everything that happened,� Ray said. His voice was low and a bit gravelly. He sounded unhappy, but not at me. Just kind of sad.

�We got there, just like I said on the phone. We got there, Joey picked the lock, and everything went to hell. I mean, I was in the fucking handbasket, you know? Joey and I went upstairs and they shot him and I ran and…Jesus! I don’t know what happened! I didn’t see anyone! I didn’t do anything! Ray, man, you gotta help me with this. Are they gonna come after me?� My mind was racing with all the dime novels and dirty comic books I had read, all the gangster serials and screaming headlines. I couldn’t think of anything but the barrel of a gun stick into my back, or someone unloading a heater full of lead on my car. I was going to be sick again, I just knew it.

�It’s OK, kid. Really. You look a little green. Bathroom’s down the hall.�

I got up and walked unsteadily about halfway down the hall to the shitter. I know you don’t call it a �shitter� in a house as fancy as Ray’s, but at that time I didn’t care. I ran the other half of the way.

After I was through in there, I came back out to the room where Ray was waiting for me. He had taken the glass of cognac away, I had barely touched it, and had a glass of milk waiting for me. I may have been a tough guy now, but I was still a nineteen-year-old kid. The milk really helped to calm me down.

When I had drunk a little, Ray leaned forward and spoke to me again, this time his voice so quiet the words seemed to slide through the air to me, like sheets of paper falling off of a desk.

�We’ll get ‘em, kid. Don’t worry about that. But you have to help us, OK? Can you remember anything about them?�

I shook my head. No, I couldn’t remember anything. Just that there were four of them, and one of them shot Joey three times. I remembered suits and ties, shiny shoes and oily hair. I thought one of them was a black guy, but I wasn’t sure. I wished I was more help.

�Don’t you worry about it,� Ray said. �You look like you need some sleep. There’s an empty room down the hall that you can have for the night. Third door on the right, just before you come to the bathroom. Get some rest, kid.� And then Ray got up and left the room. He went into a little phone alcove near the kitchen and I heard him pick up the handset. A few seconds later I heard him speaking in low, quiet tones to someone on the other end. I went to the bedroom and laid down, still in all my clothes, minus the shoes, of course.

I’m not sure when I fell asleep, but I didn’t wake up until almost nine o’clock the next morning. I wandered out to the living area and didn’t see Ray anywhere, nor was he in the bathroom or the kitchen. I sat down to wait in the same chair I had sat in the night before, but I didn’t have to sit there long.

A tall blonde woman walked into the room from the hallway on the other side of the fireplace. The fireplace divided the apartment in half on that end, a hall going down on each side. I had been on the right hand hallway.

�Uh, he-hello, Mrs…� I realized I didn’t know Ray’s last name. �Uh, ma’am.�

She just looked at me, looked me up and down, then nodded to me. �I’ll call a car for you. You must be with Ray.� And then she went and picked up the headset. �Where do you need to go?�

I stammered out my home address to her and she nodded again. I had never seen a woman as beautiful as her before. Long blonde hair, blue eyes hidden behind long lashes. Legs that went from the floor to the ceiling. I admit that I stared at her until the car came. She didn’t seem to notice; if she did, she didn’t seem to mind.

When the car came, they took me home. I had a piece of paper waiting for me inside the door. They needed me to come to the office to talk about the next job. Kind of funny to think of something as disjointed and spread out as the Mob having an office. They had several of them, though, all through the burroughs, so the operatives, or whatever they called us, could check in and get paid more easily. And to keep them from being tracked as easily, too. I showered, shaved, and dressed, then went to check in.

My office was close enough to home to walk. I didn’t have much of a choice, really. I was too broke to buy a car and couldn’t afford to take a cab for something as routine and close as a trip to the office. Besides, if I was ever followed by the cops and kept hailing cabs to take me to the same place, they’d eventually figure it out. Given enough time, a pig can put two and two together.

When I got to the office, Max was sitting in the front room. We said hi to each other, then he handed me an envelope. �Pay,� he said. �You got a little extra for the lights last night.� And then he walked away. We weren’t really close at this time, hadn’t been since before college, but I wondered at why he was so distant. I didn’t have time to wonder much, though, as Ray peeked out of a door and waved me in.

�Kid, I need you to tell me everything you can about the guys last night. We’re gonna send some people out after ‘em and we need to find ‘em fast. No one fucks with us and gets to run their mouth about it.�

�I told you what I know last night, Mr….Ray. I don’t know what else to tell you.�

�Just tell us everything that happened again, OK?�

I nodded and finally looked around the room. There was a big, round table in the middle of the room, surrounded by high-backed chairs. The chairs were full of men shrouded in shadows and cigarette smoke. I couldn’t have identified any of them any more than the bastards last night. But I sat down at the head of the table and told my story again. When I had finished, I got up to leave.

�Sit down, kid, we’re not through with you, yet,� said one of the table men. He had a heavy look on his face and he was balding. �Why didn’t you shoot any of them?�

�Come on, Jim. He’s just a kid!�

Jim looked at the speaker, a much older man with a large shock of white hair. The old man was dressed to the nines in a silk suit, with his silk hat sitting on the table in front of him. He returned Jim’s stare with a slightly amused look on his face. �What do you want him to have done, Jim? Gun them all down? A green kid like this against four armed men?�

�Four?� Jim snorted. �Only one of ‘em had a gun.� His New Jersey accent showed through heavily. �He coulda at least taken a shot or two at ‘em. No pain, no gain, ya know.� Jim and the old guy looked at me again.

�I…. I’m sorry I didn’t shoot at them, sir. I was scared out of my gourd. I couldn’t hardly walk, I have no idea how I got out of there,� I blubbered.

�It’s OK,� Ray said. Seems like he said that to me a lot those couple of days. Ray was a great guy to have around, really. He understood a lot more than you would think a rich guy like him would.

�No, it’s not. I want to make it up to you guys,� I said. �Send me out after ‘em, too. I won’t run this time. I won’t chicken out. I’ll take care of ‘em. Besides, I’d be able to identify them better by my own eyes than I could ever tell you with words.�

The council looked at me for hours, or so it seemed. I’m sure it was only a minute or two, but I began to feel very small. Still, this world was my world, it was all I knew. If I couldn’t make it here, if I couldn’t stand the pressure and the danger, where would I go? Finally they stopped looking at me — the relief — and a few of them nodded.

�Alright, we will,� Ray said.

A few more things were brought up; who to send with me, where we should go to look first, what kind of weapons we should take. The meeting broke up, we all left, and I went to find the guys I’d be working with.